Excerpt 1

This is my first excerpt post.  I will post one every week, or more often if I write well.  My thoughts/notes will be italicized, and my novel will be regular font.  Current word count: 1895.  For more information on what all of this is, go to my profile at nanowrimo.org.

Reine stalked the mall hallway behind security guard Marks.  He’s invited her to call him Tim, his first name, when he met her, but he definitely wasn’t her type, so she – possibly not too courteously – declined.  Unfortunately, it didn’t seem to dissuade him in the least.  He just grinned and said something stupid about her calling him whatever she wanted to.  Reine was sure that in another life, this guy had killed her.  She was just naturally averse to him.  Neither Tyler nor Marks noticed this, however.  It’s all one could expect, seeing that they were both at least twenty-five and male.
Twenty-five?  Reine glanced at her companion through a veil of long, black bangs.  She grimaced at the thought of actually spending time with him when Tyler didn’t force her to.  She stopped her thoughts right there in a rare but heroic effort to think kindly and truthfully.  Marks wasn’t so bad looking after all.  He was slightly stocky, but being a mall cop in a small, quiet town explained that.  The words “small” and “quiet” stuck in her mind as she thought about how her mom had said them while convincing Reine that coming to this place wouldn’t be a bad idea.  In an effort to get rid of those thoughts as she did with anything connected to her mom now, Reine forced herself to continue evaluating Marks.  She almost shuddered when she noticed how greasy his moderately short brown hair was, how it pressed down over his short forehead, almost falling into the hazel eyes that Reine realized with a sudden start had been turned her way.
Marks smirked, but he thankfully didn’t bring it up again. Reine continued piling up her disgusted thoughts.  This guy was so self conceited that he thought she was looking him over because she liked him!  Because she wasn’t sure whether to be utterly disgusted or terrificly horrified, Reine chose to be neither.  Marks was also somewhat thick and a bit of a pushover, Reine had quickly decided when she first met him.  So far tonight, she hadn’t had a chance to really notice whether or not he had changed.  She was sure that he hadn’t, though.  Marks wasn’t the kind of guy to change for the better.  Marks wasn’t the kind of guy to do anything for the better, actually.


Marks caught himself staring at Reine.  Not that she was necessarily unusually pretty or anything, he was just still in shock.  To be fair, he decided, she was pretty in her own way.  The more he’d mulled this over, the more he’d liked it.
He suddenly realized that they were just standing in the middle of the mall’s front entrance, so he told her that his job was to walk the halls and explained that he was doing that now.  She followed him without a word.  They had continued in silence, and Marks had used the time to come to a decision that although she wasn’t necessarily his taste, he was sure he could make an exception since she seemed to be entirely taken up with him.  Obviously, that wasn’t surprising in the least, but now that it had been proven, he was glad all the same.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s